On November 5th 2012, my wife gave birth to our first child. During the pregnancy I decided that I would write about the experience. Every week since I have documented all of the events that took place throughout this time, along with my thoughts on them. Now that I can confirm that our baby is happy and healthy, I will share those thoughts with you.
Week 17 – We’re Having A…Wait For It…
Finally the time is upon us. We have an appointment with our doctor and we are finally far enough along to determine the sex of the baby. In typical fashion we are on different sides on this matter. Naturally I want a boy, while Jess wants a girl. Of course we want the baby to be healthy first, but like I talked about before, that’s only slightly ahead of getting the gender you want. Suffice to say, it’s a quiet and fairly tense ride. I’ve been trying not to think about it too much this whole time. I figure that if I don’t think too much about what the baby is, I can’t be too disappointed if the result isn’t what I initially wanted. I play with my cousin’s daughter and I can definitely get on board with having a girl. It’s only the teenage years that really worry me. Jessica has not been able to stop thinking about it. She wants a girl bad. In all honesty we would like one of each. The problem is that there is a long history of boys coming from my side of the family, with a more even mix on her side. With that in her head, Jess’ fear is that if we have a boy first, we’ll have a boy second too (if we even have a second). Then if we have two boys, we have to make the decision about if we want a third shot at bringing in a girl. Then what if that’s a boy too? The idea of the reverse happening has popped into my head too, but I’ve been avoiding thinking about that.
Finally we get to the office. The wait is a little longer than expected, but then again five seconds would feel like five years given the circumstances. We go in, get the sonogram started and take a look at our baby. First check, heartbeat, movement, everything looking good. Whatever! Let’s get to the goods. It’s weird enough seeing our child so much bigger than the last time we did this. It’s even weirder to be so actively looking at your child for genitalia. Of course the little punk wasn’t in the mood to move around like the last time. None of the belly shaking our doctor did could get this kid to move, but we finally got a glimpse of what we believe to be…
“I’m pretty sure that’s a penis,” our doctor said. Pretty sure? We’re not paying for pretty sure! Turns out the kid was at just the right angle so that you can’t really tell for sure a penis from an umbilical cord to something else entirely. So now our doctor is 85% sure that we are having a boy. I’m excited of course, but I’m not letting myself get too carried away. First off, 85% is not enough for me to give my hopes up. Second, Jess is having the opposite reaction right next to me, and is not taking that 85% lightly. After going through a short stretch of disappointment, Jess began to come around on the idea of a boy, but that 85% still left hope that we’d be having a girl after all. So many people said they thought it was a girl. She felt it. I was almost sure of it just because it would be my luck. We had to make another sonogram appointment for two weeks later, but Jess would not be able to wait that long to know for sure.
The next day Jess hit the internet looking for places that specialize in sonograms on short notice. She finally found one in the Bronx that would see her. She made the appointment and drove to an office that was roughly the size of our current living room. I couldn’t go because I had work and, to be honest, I was happy with the result the first time. So for $65 in cash, Jess was able to get 3D pictures and video which included a bathroom shot (when the camera is pointing up at the child’s junk like it was spying on someone from a toilet) of what is 100% confirmed to be a beautiful baby…
Yes, I’m thrilled. Jess is happy as well. We know that we are having a boy that means that instead of saying “it” all the time we can now say “he” or “our son.” This is mildly terrifying. We had been talking about this baby like “it” was so far away. Just something that would come up down the line. But now “he” is coming. There is a person that will be here in about five months that does not exist right now and it will be our fault. That is a pretty overwhelming feeling. Aside from a penis, our baby now also has a name. While there were various girl names we liked (with one favorite) there was really only one boy’s name that we have been able to agree on. So with that said, we now openly refer to our son as Alexander Santise. Whether it’s Alex, or Lex, or Al for short (it won’t be Al), it has an actual name now. It didn’t necessarily seem real before, but it can’t be any more real now. At least not for another five months. The only thing more ridiculous than us calling him by name is our family and friends doing it as well. “Alex is going to be tall like his father.” “Little Alex is going to be here sooner than you think.” “Alexander won’t be short on babysitters.”
I’m having a son. His name will (most likely) be Alexander Santise.
I can’t wait to meet him.