On November 5th 2012, my wife gave birth to our first child. During the pregnancy I decided that I would write about the experience. Every week since I have documented all of the events that took place throughout this time, along with my thoughts on them. Now that I can confirm that our baby is happy and healthy, I will share those thoughts with you.
Week 24 – The Illusion Of Having It All Figured Out
The rarest of occasions have become a reality. I went out after work on consecutive nights, drinking with buddies (a different set each night) and without my lovely wife. This is so overdue that it’s almost sad. I haven’t seen a lot of these people in what seems like ages and I’ve been in need of blowing off some steam and acting like I wasn’t a 30 year old expectant father and potential home owner. I know said before that I am over going out all the time and partying, but I have to let loose a little every once in a while right? It was not to go exactly as I thought it would though. As I had also mentioned before, I’m the first out of a large number of my friends to have a kid. So of course, now that I’m finally out, what do you think all my friends want to talk about?
“Do you know what it is yet?”
“Is there a name picked out?”
“How long until you start taking him to games?”
I probably spent half of both nights talking about the baby. Very little debauchery and nothing to speak of a hangover (the best thing about it).
It got me thinking about how I was when my relatives that weren’t that much older than me were having kids. I was approaching 20 when my older cousins got into the baby making business, and it seemed like they had it all figured out. They were so responsible with their houses and children and responsibilities. I couldn’t even imagine being in that situation.
Fast forward about a decade and now here I am. Married. Kid on the way. Ready to close on a house. Jess and I talk about it and how ridiculous it is that we are as grown up as we are, and how when you get down to it we have absolutely no idea what we are doing. We’re new to everything and at times we feel completely over our head. So now looking back, I realize that my cousins were probably going through the same thing when I was younger. They were probably freaking out and nervous and exciting and everything I am now. It also makes me think of all my friends that aren’t close to having kids yet. I wonder if they look at me and Jess and think we have everything together. After all, I’m a 30 year old married man who is in the process of buying a house and has a kid on the way. Sounds pretty together to me.